I grew up in the Portland, Maine area, but spent most of my twenties in New York City writing and editing for the kinds of magazines that told men how to dress, travel, and eat right; to live a life that looked perfect on the outside. And that's what I had: a life that was very Instagrammable, but not all that functional. I was anxious, addicted, and exhausted. The fall was inevitable, and when it came, it was tougher than I expected. I spent five years sifting through my past and my pain, and along the way, I started doing the only thing that made sense: I wrote about it.
A lot of what I learned in those years ended up as personal essays in GQ, Men’s Health and Medium. I wrote about my father’s obsession with the Eagles, confronting a middle school bully, my experience wearing makeup, and the numerologist grandmother in Florida who changed the course of my life.(Her name is Linda Ward.) The rest of it ended up in a manuscript I'm at work on called The Shadow Project.
Whenever my personal essays were published, I’d get emails and DMs from people wanting to connect in a vulnerable, real way. I loved it. So in the fall of 2019, I launched a coaching practice specializing in shadow work. Our shadows are the proverbial skeletons in our closet, the dark aspects of ourselves we keep hidden from the world and from ourselves. They're also the secret ingredient to unlocking our superpowers and transforming our lives.
These days, I coach men through the process of identifying, owning, and integrating their shadows, and it's become the most exciting and fulfilling part of my days. Another way to work with me is through the Thursday night men's group I co-lead with Elliot Aronow. The group is a great resource for men looking for more sanity, creativity and expression in their lives.
Since 2017, I’ve lived in Los Angeles, where it’s 80 degrees in February, and I have, after many years of effort, finally thawed out. In my free time, you can find me on the tennis court, singing in my car, or sitting outside at Erewhon, the supermarket love of my life. In a moment of great irony for a former fashion journalist, I also try to spend as many of my days barefoot as possible.
Email: sean [dot] hotchkiss [at] gmail [dot] com